As I was scrolling Pinterest the other night, this picture quote showed up saying "JOMO- Joy Of Missing Out" and I laughed because it was a Saturday night, the boys and I just did a little of nothing all day. I took a few pictures. Our pure excitement of the day was going to the rainbow car wash. I can't tell you the last time I "went out." My laugh was the reflection of what life used to look like.


I suffered from FOMO-"Fear Of Missing Out" for a very long time. Being able to reflect now on those years of my life, I had FOMO because I just wanted to fit in. If I was not at the event, the bar that weekend, whatever it was going on, I would have felt like I was missing out. And honestly, that fear of missing out gave me so much anxiety. I thought in my head that if I was at everything than that meant I was "in the crowd" and that I had friends. Having a busy social calendar was on the top of my priority list. 


Then it came to the nights where I had to stay home. Man was my anxiety in full force. I watched social media just to see who was out, what was going on, and what I was missing out on. Honestly, it made me mad, jealous, and a little resentful. In my head, I should be there and I was going to "lose friends" if I wasn't.


The FOMO continues...


Scandal, divorce, rumors really change societies perception of you. Add pregnancy to it and that social status becomes nonexistent. Kane and I moved into our home and began throwing our new normal together. In that time frame, I wasn't given a choice and I had to miss out. At the time, I thought my world was ending in more ways than one. I spent weekend after weekend watching everyone's snap stories, social media posts, and that pit in my stomach continued to grow. The realization that everything I feared from the previous years was happening. It wasn't a part of the crowd anymore and I was on the bottom of the totem pole. Life was going on for everyone without me... It was like I didn't exist anymore. There was no JOMO in my life at all. Pure FOMO.


After I recovered from pregnancy, went back to work, and had a schedule with the boys set- I was on a mission to regain my "social status." (I'm laughing right now) This lasted a total of like three months. My FOMO was back in full swing again though, and it made me look foolish. In those three months, I made a lot of mistakes and I'm fully able to admit that. I was playing catch up in my head, trying to heal from a lot of pain, but in process trying to figure out this new single life stuff. I was trying to fit into places that I no longer belonged. The more I pushed, the harder it became. I just wanted acceptance from someone, and it wasn't working at all. 


I became a person I didn't recognize. Heck, I didn't even like me so why would anyone else? Looking back though, I needed those months of being a wreck. I needed to mess up. I needed to fall apart. I needed rock bottom.


JOMO... You arrived (and never left.)


The day I started 75 Hard for the first time in December of 2022, changed my life. I was actually given the choice to miss out and I forced myself to sit in my own company. Through those 75 Days, I willing spent those kid free weekends alone most of the time. I stopped watching social medias and spent my time doing productive tasks. I received my Certified Personal Trainer Certification. I read a lot about learning to be comfortable in my own skin, following your own path, self-confidence, and most importantly, why we do the things we do. When I say I fully change my perspective in 75 days, I mean it. I can tell you exactly why FOMO controlled my life, and it comes down one statement-


The person looking back at me in the mirror hated herself and she was looking for validation in anyone and everyone who would give her attention.


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If you knew me than, I promise you don't know me now.


I'm not that person anymore. I prefer to miss out these days. And it's not that I'm stuck up, anti-social or a bitch. I have healed from multiple different situations that I have caused or people have done to me. And in that healing, I've just developed a huge sense of peace around me and my boys, and we thrive in it. If you ask me, "Did you see this or that?" or "Did you hear?" My answer 9 times out of 10 is "Nope." I'm not hurt or offended anymore when I don't get an invite. But I am very grateful for the few who do include me. I laugh at rumors and don't work to change people's opinion. Cause that's just what it is, an opinion. I'm not going to pretend like I don't have my days, because I do. But all in all, I am so content in life, who I am, and what I've built, that I don't need anyone else's validation to define me. 


I ask these questions to you tonight...

  • What are you scared of missing out on?
  • Why are you not content within the walls of your own home?
  • Who are you trying to impress?
  • Why do you have FOMO?
  • WHY?!?!


Tonight, my JOMO- A kid free Friday night, in my sweats catching up on shows and working. Disconnected from the world around me and being content right where I'm at.